Amber - I'm still working on it

 Good new week.  I love the start of a week, it feels so fresh and open, full of possibilities and potential.  I don't have anything planned until the weekend when we all go north for Crystal's wedding.  Unfortunately I'm starting the week with sore feet and cramps.  My foot has drastically improved and Sunday I barely noticed it.  However, I must have done something or not been careful enough because today it's feeling a bit sore and then my other foot is sore from walking funny.  Then there are those cramps, Sunday morning was worse but they left so soon that I thought it might be an easy day today but alas they have come back.  We were going to go shopping but I guess I'll wait until tomorrow.  We are busy today though I was about to start the laundry but then grandma said she was tired so I turned off the tv and sat at my computer to do this instead.  She is right there asleep on the couch.  We can do laundry when she wakes up.  I'm aiming for the same goals because I still feel they are correct.  However, if I do things exactly the same then expecting different results is defined as insanity.  (I just noticed grandma's shoes are on the wrong feet!).  I'm going to continue to do energy healing and scripture study the same because those are working just as they are.  I've got to get my prayer in at 8:30 no matter what else is happening.  I'm thinking I'll add that to my morning prayers and maybe do some energy work on it.  We'll see if that will help.

1. 8:30 I say my repentance prayer.

2. I make a plan and prepare for the next day.

3. 10:00 I get off of all electronics.

4. 10:30 I go to bed.

5. I get up at 6 am.

6. I exercise first thing.

7. I do the rest of my morning routine.

8. I add the rest of evening routine.

Monday:

* I was reading 4 Nephi this morning and I found a part I liked.  This was the longest length of peace and happiness in the book of Mormon.  They were all united, they shared all their goods so that no one was poor, miracles were a common event, they grew in number and wealth, they repaired and built new cities.  Everyone was joined with the church of God.  There was so much peace and prosperity that it seemed like they had everything they needed.  So when I read that they were continually praying and fasting it made me think.  Often though not always I more prayers when I'm needing help, when I'm struggling with something.  And with fasting it is always the case.  I don't fast very well if I'm not struggling with something.  Yet here the people in 4 nephi were seemingly living perfectly happy lives yet they did plenty of prayer and fasting.  It is important to remember that these things are for use in times of joy as well as trouble.

• I woke up around 7.
• No exercise, cramps alone usually prevent that but maybe is good to let the foot heal one more day.
• I missed a day and forgot what my evening was like.  Oh yes I did do my prayer but none of the other stuff.  I spent the evening playing a game until midnight.

Tuesday:

* I didn't find a thought today.

• I woke up at about 8, I got a little over 8 hours of sleep and I feel really good this morning.
• I was late and we had a lot to do so I skipped exercise again.
• Nothing on my evening stuff.  I started a movie at the last minute and couldn't get myself to turn it off and watch tomorrow.  Though I did think about my prayer when my alarm went off.
• Bonus: Not paper dolls.  I'm taking a series of free sewing information and tutorial videos that is part of the costume community.  Most of them are based on historical things and I'm really excited to learn some new stuff.  I've learned some valuable stuff about printed cotton in the 18th century, what goes into making clothing for commission (not in my plans currently), watched someone make 18th century stays (totally in my plans depends on how soon I find the right fabric for a gown), and a few other things.  Then I came to the first tutorial and I am currently learning how to do historical embroidery stiches while making a historical scissors case.  I'll show a picture when I'm done.  Which could be a while because I'm a slow hand stitcher.

Wednesday:

* I read Mormon 2.  This book is a little depressing for me.  Today the story reminded me of all the times I try to go it alone.  I'm well practiced at this experience and can relate to the failures of the Nephites at this time in the story.  They were fortifying the cities and fighting battles but in the past they relied on the Lord and the outcome was they were successful.  Now man to man they had the same strength as the Lamanites and were outnumbered.  In my life I try to do something I feel is right but I try to do it my way with out consulting the Lord.  I just for success and move on often not involving the Lord in any other way than the occasional prayer.  Having failed so much I'm now putting myself aside and making sure I involve the Lord in my plans.  Even if my plans seem more appealing.  I have found much more success and more importantly I don't give up like I used to.  I find the strength to go on even when progress seems minimal or backwards.

• I was in bed around midnight again but I really wanted to get up early enough so I set the alarm and got up at 7.
• I did some yoga today!  It was a 13 minute video focused on upper body strength and I lasted until the last round.  I feel so weak!  However I will keep trying.
• I said my prayer but 30 mins late.
• I did plan for the next day as well.
• I didn't quite prepare for the next day and I didn't get off the electronics and into bed until after 11.

Thursday:

* I find it amazing how merciful the Lord is in Mormon 3.  The people still reject him and he spares them again so that they may have another chance to repent.  Mormon says that their flaw was that one they didn't acknowledge the Lord's hand in their success and then maybe even more fundamental they didn't recognize it.  This is key to having the Lord's help, you have to be grateful for what he gives you.  It is actually kind of like a super power.  When I focus on looking for those blessings and then being grateful for them I find that I get more.  The more I acknowledge the help I receive the more I seem to be able to do and the more opportunities seem to appear.  It's like magic only better because it comes from a source who knows what is best for me.

•  I got up late, at around 8.
• I did some relaxing yoga for about 15 mins.
• I was late on my evening stuff but I did say my prayer and plan for tomorrow right before I went to sleep which was at around 10:20 or so.

Friday:

* Reading Mormon 4 didn't give me any amazing insights.  The one thing I liked was how Mormon said if they hadn't chosen to go take revenge on the Lamanites then the Nephites would have remained safe and the Lamanites would have had no power over them.  I the previous chapter Mormon refuses to lead them because of this.  The Lord told him that vengeance is the Lord's and he will take care of it.  With the Lord all things will be made right no matter how unfair things seem now.  By trusting in the Lord's timing and doing as he says and when he says then we will protected from making foolish mistakes.

• I got up at 7:30, I've been getting good sleep lately because I've been kicking my phone out at night.  It is a major difference when I do, I fall asleep much faster and I sleep quietly without tossing and turning or waking up.  I feel well rested when I wake up, assuming I got enough hours.  If I only get 6 then I'm still groggy and tired, I need 8-9 hours to feel really good.
• I did a very short but packed yoga exercise of 5 mins.  It was too fast for me, I'd rather go a little slower, I wonder if I can slow it down next time.  I just checked and yes I can play the video at a slower speed if I want.
• I failed the evening goals, I was really late going to bed.

Saturday:

* In Mormon 5 there is a visual I love.  Mormon says that the Nephites were without Christ and God and because of this they are like chaff driven by the wind or like a boat that has no sail or anchor or anything to steer with.  This second visual sounds really scary to me.  I'm somewhat terrified of the ocean and the thought of being stuck with no idea of which way to go and no way to go that way if I knew is horrifying.  Yet this is exactly what so many people experience in their lives.  They have no foundation, no direction, and no power.  They are lost and the further they get from God the more desperate and lost they seem.  I'm so grateful that I have an anchor that keeps me grounded, knowledge of where I need to head, and  a knowledge of where I can get the power to do so.

• Ok so I was up so late last night that I just let myself wake when I did, this happened to be at 8.  So it wasn't as bad as I thought it might be.
• I didn't exercise today, I was far too busy because we left for the wedding.
• I didn't say my prayer or plan and prepare for tomorrow.
• My main failing was not getting off of the phone.  I was on until after midnight even though I went to bed before 10.

Sunday:

*Today was a strange day, we had company and we didn't get much Sunday stuff done.  I didn't even read my scriptures today.  Oddly enough Sunday is the only day that that ever happens.  I suppose I don't really feel the lack when I've already had a fair amount of spiritual food.  So this means today I don't have a thought.

• I woke late, almost 9.
• I don't plan on exercising on Sunday.
• I didn't do any of my evening stuff again.

Pretty bad progress this week, I'll confess I've been focusing too much on my energy healing and sewing.  These goals really need to come first and they haven't been.  I'll try again next week.